my frustration

everyone started joining the tape... the CEU hymn blasting over the speakers and everyone joined in. I just stood there... trying to catch my breath... wanting to scream... wanting to cry... it's all over now, my sleepless nights had paid off. when the singing ended... i came up to ice and hugged her tightly. despite all that's happened, ice made things possible... suddenly people were coming over me and congratulating my team... it was the most awesome feeling... all my sacrifices, all the pain, all the sweat had proved its worth.

Dr. Barcarse even approached me and asked a copy of my speech to print in "The Escolarian"... It was unbelievable... it was my happiest moment...

but I went home last night without anyone to talk to...
Everyone still hated me... and I didn't even mean it!

i do curse a lot... a sickness i've had forever... I curse for fun, I curse when mad... but I never curse at people...

The day I walked out on mommy and cried profusely in the car... screaming and pleeding I was frustrated... I was mad... I was feeling very vulnerable... I was shattered... and mang jun had no right to tell mom i was cursing at her cus i wasn't.

there''s a difference between cursing and cursing at people. potpot curses... she exits an atgument and curses under her breath. what i did is comparable to that... and man jun had no right to exaggerate the situation by merely saying: "minumura kayo"... cus i said more than that...

"tanginang buhay to ganito nlang palagi! pagid na pagod na nga ako sa school ganito pa? puro lait na nga ang natatanggap ko sa school, tangina tapos ganito? bakit si potpot pwedeng maging busy? bakit kapag ako hindi? tangina buong buhay nlang ganito! tangina pagod na pagod na ako"

i believe that if he wanted to tell the story of what happened that day... he should tell everything... cus i cursed out of frustration... i wasn't merely cursing...

now i dont know what to do... my whole family hates me...
it's okay... everyone love him naman eh, brave... kind... helpful mang jun... one day... one day...